living in the presence.

If you didn't know, there are four teams within 24/7. One is made up of Cadre and the other three are groups of first years, with one Cadre "coach" for each team of first years. Each team except Cadre has a name chosen by the team coach that has a specific meaning. My team is "Coram Deo," meaning "living in the presence of God" in Latin. Boy is that an appropriate name for what we went through today.

In a nutshell, today was a total God day. His presence was unmistakable in everything we did throughout the day.

Yesterday during prayer I basically made a vow to God that I would not give up during workouts anymore. My mom told me once that the most effective diet she ever tried was one where she had to make a vow to God to stick with the plan. NO ONE wants to break a vow made to God! You might as well just pray to be struck by lightning, right? So I figured that would be a great motivator...and I was so right. Today, each time I felt like I couldn't lift any more weight, run even one more step or do one more lunge or bear crawl, I just thought to myself, "I literally can't give up. I made a vow to God that I would not give up, so I just can't." And I got through it! I felt so empowered! God gives us total access to all he has for us, yet we continue to choose not to take what He has to offer! When He offers us wisdom, we settle for what we already know. When He offers us strength, we give up when we could still push harder. When He offers love and companionship, we choose to give into false feelings of loneliness and depression. WHAT IS WRONG WITH US? Why can't we just accept what He has already offered to us?? I'm learning to trust Him and rely on him for everything I need more and more each day.

Then during morning prayer I had such a strong feeling that there was just this ridiculously thick, immoveable cement wall between God and I, blocking me from really hearing from Him. When I was praying, I felt like I was talking to a wall. When I prayed for answers, I heard nothing. I got so discouraged and prayer ended on a sad, frustrated note for me. When Pastor Alex came into the room for class, I expected to sit back and listen to a godly man for an hour and that would be it. I was wrong. Our lesson today was on reading the Bible. Pastor Alex talked about all that God has to offer us through the Word, how to read and study the Bible, and he hammered into our heads over and over the fact that if we do not get into the Word every single day, we are voluntarily separating ourselves from God. I realized that that is exactly what I have been doing. All this time I've been praying for God to really speak to me or to show me what he wants me to do in certain situations, but I'm not doing my part by reading the Bible. God speaks to us most clearly through His Word, so how do we expect to hear Him if we are not constantly reading the Bible? I feel so stupid now! But it's a good thing. :) I can't wait to read the Word more and more until I really start to hear God clearly. It'll be a process, but an amazing, life-altering one.

After a Q&A with Pastor Randy and his wife, Amy, and our lunch break, we met back in the youth auditorium for our next instructions. Class time today was cancelled so that we could work on the dramas we will be performing on outreaches and mission trips. I was a little nervous because the two skits made for the kids required LOTS of exaggerated silliness and the serious one required lots of step memorization and acting talent. We practiced the first two, which are mostly just funny skits for drawing crowds in and entertaining kids, and it was SO FUN! The first was called "If I Were Not Upon a Stage," and was a silly, fast-paced, hilarious teamwork skit. Each person had their own combo speaking/moving part, where the first person would go, then the second and first, then the third, second, and first, and so on. It is seriously the most fun thing EVER. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kaATfmhwsv4) The second skit we did was a non-speaking skit called "Catch All," which starts with a line of about seven people with their backs to the crowd. The first person, or Catch All, acts out a normal routine, like yawning or pretending to wash their face, and soon the second person in line faces the crowd and acts out a super-silly "symptom" such as squawking like a chicken or sneezing uncontrollably. Once the second person bumps into the Catch All, that person is "cured' and the Catch All now acts out that symptom. The other people in line one by one act out their symptom, then give it to the Catch All, resulting in a hilarious string of symptoms that the Catch All must act out all at once. (There's not really any good videos of this one online, but it's probably easier to imagine.)

The third skit is silent, very serious and moving. Many people are familiar with the Lifehouse "Everything" skit. I've seen it done more than 15 times and when the right people do it, it is seriously more moving every time. The concept is this: a girl is living the "normal" Christian life, and has a good relationship with God. She is happy with this, but a boyfriend/lover comes in and sweeps her out of God's arms and into his own. (This skit is kind of dance-y, so there are several short dance sequences.) Next, she is grabbing greedily at money, which another character waves around her, just out of reach. Next, she is pressured into drinking by a friend, then pressured into throwing up from a pretty, popular girl. Then she is introduced to cutting herself and ultimately holds a gun to her head, ready to commit suicide. At the last possible moment, she throws the gun to the floor and jumps back toward God, who is now separated from her by all the other characters. She lunges towards Him over and over, being punched and knocked down by the evil characters, but doesn't give up until she ends up back in His arms again. I CRY EVERY TIME!!!

And the best part is: I get to be the main girl. Cadre assigned everyone their parts and they chose me to be the girl! I am excited beyond all belief to be a part of this skit, but so nervous because I've never done anything like this before. It is so awesome that each of us gets to play a part in a skit that will undoubtedly change lives all over the world. Because the concepts are acted out silently, there is no language barrier when we perform it for people who speak foreign languages. This skit contains something for every kind of person at every stage of life. WE ARE GONNA CHANGE LIVES!! I can't wait to start practicing this skit and perform it ASAP.

So yeah, that's basically my day. Totally crazy and hectic, but completely wonderful.

God is SO GOOD. :)

(I'll see if I can post videos of the "Upon a Stage" skit and the "Everything" skit so you guys can see them!)

the highlights.

Wow, haven't posted in a week! Let's see what I can highlight from the last few days:

• Friday night my team destroyed the buffet at Hungry Howies, then went on to our team coach Paul's house to hang out, play basketball, ride his motorcycle around, and listen to stand-up comedy from one of our team members. Awesome night of fun and relaxation.
• Saturday Adopt-a-Block went SO well and twice as many people showed up as last time. My 3 1/2 hour break after outreach was spent being a couch potato, taking the longest shower of my life, and spending an hour and a half on curling my hair just because I could! Church on Saturday night was awesome as usual since I get to work in the cafe for both services.
• Sunday services were great, but the day went downhill once CT started and my team was given the most pointless, frustrating yardwork around the church to work on for 4 hours. Sunday night I had dinner with my home sponsors and Mrs. Ault's parents, and we had home grown/slaughtered chicken! I'm starting to get used to the fact that we eat animals that we just fed and bonded with yesterday... :)
• Monday, my day off, was spent working with my mom and making some extra cash, training for the triathalon at the Y, and hanging out with my home sponsors.
• Tuesday was morning prayer, scripture memory test (2 of my team members failed AGAIN), outreach to USF Sarasota (I got a caricature done by an artist there for free!! It's SO cute! He even drew in my nose ring!!), and Venue at night. Each week our Venue service gets better and better, and I even got the chance to talk with someone I haven't seen since senior year! Tuesday was also the beginning of our 3-day Daniel fast, during which we were only allowed to eat fruit, veggies, and nuts. It may not sound too bad, and fruit is definitely delicious, but that diet radically confuses your body and you constantly feel like you're starving to death.
• Yesterday was day 2 of the Daniel fast, and we all felt a little weaker and more hungry than the previous day. My team started out the day walking around the church at 5:30am (shocker!) for an hour for scripture memory CT. Then during morning prayer with the regular church members I just felt uninspired and exhausted, which made me feel SUPER guilty since it's supposed to be time where you just give back to God and worship Him. I was so tired that I couldn't even let myself close my eyes because I would fall asleep, even if I was standing up! After prayer I was feeling very unhappy with myself, and Justin said he wanted to speak with the whole group. We figured he would tell us to go outside and start running our usual route (Wednesdays are always running days) but instead he told us that workout was cancelled!! We were SO excited, especially since we were so hungry and caught off guard physically because of the fast. Instead of a physical workout, Justin told us we would do a spiritual workout, which turned out to be another hour of prayer and worship. THIS time it went by so quickly, and I was completely encouraged and excited throughout the whole hour and long afterword. It was just what I needed! Then my group had our Venue Prep meeting to work out the kinks from the previous night, and we were dismissed for showers/lunch for THREE AND A HALF HOURS. It was such a ridiculously long break I didn't even know what to do with myself. I forgot what it was like to have that much free time! It was awesome, and then we met back at the church for class time and our First Wednesday duties. Overall great day! :)
• Now, if you think yesterday sounded good, today was AMAZING. We started off with CT at 6:30, and surprisingly my team and I were in great moods and were just excited to hang out together, even if it was freezing outside and we had to be there an hour before everyone else. I actually woke up smiling this morning! I figured that has to be a sign of a great day. After team devotions we started the first of the three games of Ultimate Frisbee! I was terrified of the frisbee once the games started because earlier, during CT, I got nailed in the face by a super-fast frisbee thrown by one of my teammates. It was a total accident but still horrifying and painful. I had a gusher nosebleed all through devotions! But I have to say that I'm lucky that the frisbee hit me right in the septum because it could have hit me a) on the bridge of my nose, leaving a dent or breaking my nose, b) where my nose ring is, possible ripping it out or pushing it through, or c) in the teeth, possibly knocking out teeth or ripping my gums. So those possibilities considered, it was the best possible scenario for getting nailed in the face with a frisbee. :) Ultimate Frisbee was a little confusing at first, but really fun! Then we had class with Pastor Matt, where we debated about divorce and gambling and whether they are sins or not or to what extent they are acceptable. SO INTERESTING!! I had to be on the "gambling is not a sin" side and it was actually really fun. My side won! Then we had ministry time where we help out other people in different ministries in the church. I got to serve in the Cafe and get trained for everything! I now know how to make lattes, cappuccinos, frappes, smoothies, americanos, hot teas, mistos, steamers, caramel macchiatos, and a billion other things! So exciting!! ANDDDDD the best part was that the fast ended at 5 today, and we got to drink the coffees we made during training! I seriously thought I died and went to heaven. So after all that, a personal pizza from Pizza Hut, a Dt. Dr. Pepper, and some TV time with my home sponsors, I have concluded that today completely rocked.

So now I'm going to bed, and hoping that somehow tomorrow will top today. Don't know how that's possible, but you never know!

(And I get to see my AMAZING sister and super-precious neice this weekend! I'm so pumped!!)

:D I love my life!

today was good :)

Today has just been one of those days that you look back on and you're just like, "now that was a great day!" I don't know if anything in particular made it that way, it just was.

We started off at the Lakewood Ranch fields for CT, then football. Everyone kind of gave a half-effort in the beginning, and none of us were really into it. My team lost every game today and it's really weird for us to lose anything, let alone 3 games in a row. The first two games were boring and I never even touched the ball, but after a team huddle we started encouraging each other and we were strangely excited for the total fail that our game against Cadre would be. Sure enough, we lost 104 to 26 (THAT'S how good Cadre plays) but we had so much fun. Even though it was definitely the hardest game, I made a few interceptions, pulled several flags, and dove for the ball, sometimes successfully, and was covered in grass and blood by the end of the game. The oh-so-lovely scab that covered my elbow from my wipe-out in the Cafe on Saturday tore, and I had to play the last half of the game with my arm extended so that I wouldn't get blood all over any white Cadre jerseys. It was awesome! That's the kind of game I love to play.

Then we had class with Pastor Matt which is always incredible. We debated about what a ministry leader would do if a) a student got pregnant while at a youth event/camp, b) your leadership made an inappropriate comment to you, and c) I can't remember. But the debates were great, and Pastor Matt always has so much insight into the godly way to handle things. Then we got to watch another Craig Groeschel video on the Elijah series which was actually done by a guest speaker, Chris Spradlin. It was such an awesome eye-opener to the power of prayer. He talked about the way to pray is with humility, perseverance and expectation and asked us to rate our prayer life on a scale of 1 to 10. I'm realizing more and more how much I need to improve my prayer life. God deserves it!

Then we had ministry time, where we break up into different ministries (hospitality, etc.) and help out the other people who work at the church, and I had a really good, deep conversation with a wonderful woman named Meredith. Yay for new friends!

Now I'm going on the 3rd hour of worship practice, and 3 more hours to go! Nothing like a night full of worshipping God!

I love 24/7 :)

sleepy.

The last time I posted, we were sitting in the youth auditorium waiting for the rest of our team to pass the Code test. We ended up sitting in that room for a total of 6.5 hours! It was brutal, but our team finally did pass right before 10:30pm, so we were just glad to go home.

Saturday we had Adopt-a-Block, where we went to a not-so-fortunate community and served free breakfast, offered free lawn services, evangelized, and had a donation table from which people could take a few things they needed. It was pretty great, but hopefully more people start to gather over the next few weeks.

Weekend services rocked as usual, and then I had Monday off. Luckily, I had the chance to work with my mom and make some extra cash. I also had to go around to 10 businesses and tell them about the Silent Auction we have coming up to raise money for our missions trips. That night I chilled with my home sponsors and we had a really fun time! The 5 of us somehow ended up on the living room floor doing weird yoga positions, headstands, backbends and a bunch of other crazy things for about an hour. Definitely a first for me! :) I love that they're such goofs!

Yesterday we did a full body workout at the Y. We did swimming, arm weights, abs, cycling, and cardio on the elliptical. Then instead of school outreaches to promote Venue that we usually do on Tuesdays, we got to listen to Spencer (a 3rd year) talk about relationships, and it was really inspiring! As someone who has never really had any successful romantic relationships yet, I'm always really interested about how to go about relationships in a way pleasing to God, and Spencer really enlightened us with what he said. Then we had our second ever Venue service and it was completely amazing. We still had around 150 people attend, despite the usual decline in attendance after the exciting first service. God is really moving in the lives of college students and 20-somethings!!

Because two of my teammates failed their scripture memory test on Ephesians 3:16-21, my team along with the other two teams all had to walk around the church for CT at 5:30 this morning. After morning prayer we had Running Day. Today I'm pretty sure we only ran 1.5 miles, but we did indian sprints the whole way, meaning that we run in a single file line and the very last person in line sprints to the front as the whole group runs. When they reach the front, the person who is now the last person in line sprints to the front, and so on. It was SO HARD, but everyone finished! Then Spencer and Tori (cadre girl) had us do about 30 minutes of ab workouts inspired by P90X. Now is class time, so I'm finishing up some work for my online classes and then getting ready for Epic tonight!

I have to say as a side note that I'm pretty impressed at how much information and scripture I've crammed into my brain in just 4 weeks! I not only have The Code memorized, but also Ephesians 5:15-16, Jeremiah 29:11-13, Romans 8:35-39, Ephesians 3:16-21, and Matthew 16:24-28. And it's amazing how your knowledge of scripture comes in handy on a daily basis. Now I have 5 more passages in scripture to use in conversations with others, prayer and when I'm talking to myself to push myself harder.

So all is well and tomorrow I'm excited for Pastor Matt's class, ministry time and worship practice!

Haven't posted in a while, but things have been so crazy.

Tuesday night we had our very first Venue service for college age and 20-somethings. The night was a COMPLETE SUCCESS! We had over 200 people show up, and we're hoping to have at least 150 regulars over the next few days. Everything was awesome, from the worship to Justin's amazing message to the free pizza afterward. :) I can't wait for next week's service when we start working out any little kinks that occurred on Tuesday.

Wednesday and Thursday my team had to serve CT by meeting an hour early to walk around. That part of the day totally sucked, but the rest of the days were really good. Wednesday we started off at the Y with swimming, elliptical, and ab workouts. Then we had Venue prep for people like me who are on the planning team, and the rest of 24/7 went to school lunches at the local high schools to promote Epic, the youth ministry. After a few hours of online classes we went to Epic, and I was surprised at how much I enjoyed myself! My brain wants me to think I wont enjoy the service because it's geared toward high schoolers, but I do love the people there and the worship was phenomenal.

Thursday we met early again for CT and then had team sports day! We played football and I must say I played a million times better than last time. I scored the extra point after one of our touchdowns, caught a pass in the end zone, had an interception, knocked the ball away from a few people's hands, and pulled a bunch of flags. My team even called me MVP of the day, which made me feel SO good since I was so clueless the last time we played. Later we had debates with Pastor Matt and helped set up for weekend services. I even got to talk to my mom for a little while, so that totally made my night! After having stir-fry with my home sponsors, I wrote an essay for our class on "Under Cover" by John Bevere and hit the sheets.

Thankfully, our call time wasn't till 6:30 this morning, which was an hour later than the last two days. We met at the Y, went running and did some cardio and weightlifting. Then we had morning prayer/worship and the day completely took a turn for the better. On Fridays at morning prayer we focus on intercession, praying for the lost and people outside of our own influence. God really spoke to the whole group and we all felt so uplifted after an hour of worship. Then we had an incredible class with Pastor Alex about the meanings and applications of worship and praise, and he totally blew our minds with all the insight he has to offer. Next, Krystle Sommers (anybody know of the bad Burden of a Day? She's the lead singer's wife!) gave her completely heart wrenching, inspiring and thought-provoking testimony. All of the girls and most of the guys were moved beyond belief by her experiences and the revelations God has given her through her circumstances. If the day had totally sucked before that, her testimony still would have cause our attitudes to go through the roof (in a good way). After a few more hours of online classes, Justin announced that we would finally have our test on The Code today. This meant every word had to be correct and every punctuation mark perfect in order for us to pass. Most everyone passed by the second try, but Justin's rule was that since it's team night tonight, each team can leave only when every member has passed the test. You can have as many rewrites as you need but you can't leave until you pass with 5 mistakes or less on the entire thing. So my team, including two exceedingly forgetful members, is still sitting here. We started at 4, it is now past 8, and we will continue to sit here until both of the remaining members pass.

So at least you all know you're having a more productive night than I am. Hopefully I won't grow a beard sitting here waiting for them to finally get it right. Most guys aren't into female facial hair.

:P

the weekend.

I haven't gotten a chance to blog in the last few days, but it really was an awesome weekend!

Saturday my team, Coram Dio, reported to the church a half hour before the other teams because we were assigned to volunteer at the Homeless Breakfast out by Manatee Memorial Hospital, while the other teams did Adopt-a-Block. I was pretty nervous since I haven't had many encounters with homeless people before, but the others who had volunteered there before assured me everything would go smoothly and I would actually like it. Just in case it did get awkward, I made sure I worked the food table, handing out plates, napkins, forks, and a banana to each person. I figured it would be an easy way to greet each person and still avoid any awkward communication because they would be moving through the line. It turned out to be really fun!! Most of the people who came through the line were either surprised and grateful that the food was free or were just happy to see us! Many of them were energetic, asked us how we were, and approached us in conversation instead of the other way around. My team and the other Bayside volunteers did an awesome job walking up to people and just talking to them about simple stuff like the weather, their favorite foods, etc. and the people really responded well. Some people were overwhelmed by the kindness they saw that day, some people acted indifferent, some refused to allow us to pray for them because they don't believe in God, and some people looked and acted no different from us. It was so easy to build relationships with them and they told all of us that they couldn't wait to see us the next time we came by! I found myself thinking on the way home that I can't wait to go back, call the people I met by their names, and meet more people.

We had several hours of free time before we had to be back at the church, so what does everyone want to do? Go to the gym. It's so crazy that I actually want to work out on my days off. So my group and I went to the gym and worked out for a while, then my friend Naomi and I went to my home sponsors' to swim. Church that night went well and Pastor Randy preached an amazing service! And as an added bonus to an already great day, Justin dismissed me early so I could go out for a birthday dinner with my parents. We went to Outback and had the most delicious food I've had in a while. :)

Sunday morning I served in Hospitality for both services. I found out that once the services were over my team and another had to serve Consequence Time by doing yard work around the church. It actually wasn't bad and the weather was perfect for being outside, so besides a few problems we had with the guy directing our work, it was a good, productive few hours. Later that night I went to the Discovery Seminar, where you learn what your motivational gifts are and how they are applied to or displayed through your life. My top gifts are Perceiver, Compassion, and Administrator. The seminar was really interesting and it helped me to understand how I think and react in certain situations.

And today was pretty calm. Got up early to finish some schoolwork due by noon, went to work with my mom, was treated to an awesome lunch at Shake Pit, swam laps at the Y, and now I'm just chilling at my home sponsors'. I am SO grateful for an easy day and the opportunity to go to bed at 6pm if I want! :)

my birthday!

Yesterday was absolutely amazing!

We had just gotten home Wednesday night around 11pm and I was up late unpacking, so the birthday wishes started flowing in as soon as it was past midnight. I literally couldn't fall asleep because my phone kept vibrating with birthday wishes via text and facebook. Luckily, we didn't have to be at the church until 10am, which is our latest arrival time so far. And there was no workout, which was for the best because we were all so dead from hiking a billion miles and then being crammed in a van for an entire day. We started off the day at the church for prayer and worship. This turned out to be really amazing because it really was the first birthday I think I've ever actually taken a chunk of my day out to just thank God for giving me life. It's a sad thing to realize, but I'm still happy that I got the chance to really think about that yesterday. Everyone in 24/7 bombarded me with hugs and birthday wishes over and over again, and I felt so special! :)

When it came time for lunch break, a few Cadre girls asked me if I wanted to go to Subway with them. I was planning on eating there anyway so I agreed, but when I got there it turned out that all of Cadre was there! I was the only first-year, and I have to admit I felt pretty special to be the only newbie to be hanging out with Cadre. One of the girls, Eberly, paid for my lunch and my third-year overseer, Spencer, said I could have soda because it was my birthday, so I took advantage of that. When we were about to leave, the girls I was with wanted to go see one of the 24/7 girls, Leslie, in the hospital. She checked into the emergency room as soon as we got back home on Wednesday night and is still there today. She has a very rare muscular disease that causes her to burn more than 20 times the amount of muscle that a person would normally burn during a workout. So when the amount of muscle burned is normally in the 140's after an average person works out, Leslie's is in the 3,000's! It's so hard to see her go through this but I jumped at the opportunity to go with the Cadre girls to see her in the hospital to encourage her and see how she was doing. Her faith is so strong, she is convinced God is going to heal her from her disease in His time, but for now she's fighting it out. So please keep her in your prayers!

After visiting with Leslie, the Cadre girls and I came back to the church (I was way late but since I was with Cadre I didn't get in trouble!). For the next hour or two we were supposed to have study hall, but about ten minutes into my studying, someone rips my computer from my hands and I find myself being lifted into the air while still on my chair by a bunch of 24/7 guys. Cadre busted into the room screaming the happy birthday song at the top of their lungs and I felt like a queen being carried by her chair legs through the room! It was such a hilarious situation all we could do was just laugh. Then one of the girls presented me with a platter full of little chocolate cupcakes that we all shared. The rest of the day with 24/7 was pretty standard, but it was so awesome.

After worship practice last night, I finally got the chance to meet up with my mom, who I haven't seen since the program started, and talk with her for a little while to catch up on everything that has gone on in the last few weeks. It was SO nice to get to talk to her!!

Then I headed home to my home sponsors', which I thought meant I would just go straight to my room because everyone would be asleep, but I walked in and saw a birthday cake complete with 20 lit candles on the dining room table, and my host family sang me happy birthday!! They even gave me a present! It was a brand new, super nice Starbucks thermos and a bunch of packs of the fabulous Via instant coffee, which I LOVE. And I even got three cards from family members that I got to open. I finally hit the sheets around 11pm after getting to talk to my home sponsors for a while and just joke around and laugh.

I have to say that it was one of my best birthdays because I just felt SO loved by everyone around me for the entire day. Not once did it feel like just another day, and I'm so grateful for everyone I was able to see and talk to yesterday as well as for the 150+ facebook birthday wishes I got. :)

But today I went back to the normal routine. Workout at 6:30am at the Y, class with Pastor Jason, college course time (which I'm currently in), and tonight is Team Time. I'm excited for what my team leader has planned for us tonight!